29.10.10

Tralalala

Oh you're not flirting? You're being nice? Then watch me being so nice to that hot guy and tell me if I am any good at it, deal?

13.10.10

A-ha! I rarely post nowadays. I must be halfway through getting a life.

How far from eureka yet?

Ugh. Creativity, I need you. NOW.

10.10.10

"I'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart."

- e e cummings

Demet

I HATE EVERYTHING RIGHT NOW. I'm in that stage again when I can't get anything done. Why does this keep coming back? Don't I get to move on and not do this anymore? It's not even a phase. I wish it were. And it isn't PMS. I'm doomed to be like this forever.

No matter what I do, people just keep disappointing me. I have come to realize that there's nothing wrong with the people around me. It's me. I keep expecting.

Pota, I'm a sad, sad breathing thing.

getting tired of this

fun isn't FUN anymore.
looking for something new.

4.10.10

what to do, what to do

To be or not to be. That is not really a question. -Jean-Luc Godard

PERO DILEMMA PA RIN S'YA, OKAY?

3.10.10

randomrandomrandom because it's four a.m. and i'm still awake and sabaw

it's all good when i'm not with you. but every time you're near and i get a whiff of your pheromones, i die. it's like getting high minus the risk of going to jail and the respiratory disease. every time you hug me--when you cuddle like a panda and i fit just perfectly in your arms--i am at my weakest, inhaling you like the air in QC (not entirely healthy nor clean, but familiar and comforting).

and on this note, i must say, you are:
*a cigarette on a chilly night
*a good book on a sunday
*a bar of chocolate during PMS
*noodle soup on a rainy day
*a TV marathon on a lazy day
*my mangga and asin-with-sili, NYFD fries, and milkshake ALL-IN-ONE

i love you most when i don't have to try too hard. because i know i do. and it's tiresome and stressful. and when i don't it feels like three in the morning when everything's simple and quiet and the internet connection is at it's fastest. i love you like a hundred thousand times over my DSL speed. i love you even when I hate you. and I hate you a lot. and I don't care how long this would last. i love you because I want to.

my father just asked me for my school records

WHAT WAS THAT ABOUT?!

I am not going back to school next semester. I am going to get a job. I need money! I hate college. What do I need a college degree for?! A career?! You've got to be kidding me. Why would I want that?!

Update: C's getting his own place in QC. Yay!

I hate the south. I want to go back up north! I want my own place in QC too!

I need a home-based job aside from my part-time. I need to save up!

This post contains too many exclamation points. ARRGGGHHHH!!!

1.10.10

i am so tired and PMS-ing right now

there are a lot of jobs out there apparently. but none that you'd like and enjoy and would treat you fairly and pay you your work's worth. fairness is apparently something that's too much to ask. injustice has become normative. nothing's wrong enough.

i'm losing my respect in people.

just stop pretending. you hate your job. you know you do. you hate the claustrophobic environment. you hate the instant coffee. you hate not having to be able to smoke whenever you want. you hate having to make excuses when you are going to be late or absent for work. you want to be able to do what you want. don't be a wuss and just do it, whatever it may be. i mean, seriously, do you really want a career?! come on. so much better things out there. much, much better.

fortunately, there are still some who are brave enough to stand up for what they believe in--with good pay or none. i miss you good people of the world. i wish to join you again soon. once i get myself out of this tangled web.

i am SABAW.

Folding Chair

I've got a perfect body, though sometimes I forget. --Regina Spektor