What is this life I'm living, F, and Sepanx

I'm too tired to post anything and it's been like this for a while.

I'm not in the mood to do anything.

The only thing meaningful that comes out of my mouth everyday is "I'm tired." So I guess that defines my life these days.

I am so infatuated with F. But wasn't I with B just a few weeks ago?

I miss talking to my friends. It was so easy when I could talk to them everyday and see them almost everyday.

I miss my Self. I miss everything that I was. I miss being content with where I was. I miss not wishing I was somewhere else or doing something else.

Maybe I do not miss F entirely but I miss the relationship I've built with him.

I want and, I guess, need to be able to start going to my Pdoc again and resume taking my meds.

Wake up, self

You should start taking care of yourself soon or you will fall apart. It might feel like you already have but believe me you're not there yet, but don't wait for it. Do something about it.